Monday, October 8, 2007

Might as Well Been the Sahara Desert

I was at the Gateway this afternoon to take Nat to the Kids' Discovery Museum. We had some lunch, did a little shopping, grabbed our validation and headed back to one of the underground parking structures.

Let me back up a little bit. I've never parked in this particular structure and was indeed quite delightfully pleased with myself that I managed to park in the exact structure that puts you right on the elevator into the Kids' Museum. I even parked only a few pillars down from the entrance so I was thinking I was really something else! That is, until it came time to find my Tahoe.

I've got my stroller, my kid, my bags and all the rest of my crap and I come out of the elevator. I head right to where I think it is...and it's not there. I walk through a few aisles...no Tahoe. I walk a few more aisles then wonder where in the heck I am. I decide maybe I'm on the wrong level. I find my way back to the blasted elevator and went up a level. I come out, quite confidant again. My poor daugher-who-already-has-an-anxiety-disorder is starting to freak out because we can't find the Tahoe. I go down to where I'm sure I parked that stupid truck and it's not there. I'm starting to wonder if someone stole it.

I push the panic button on my fob, and I can almost hear my Tahoe, "pleeeeeeeze, help me....i'm right heeeeeeeeere! hep me , hep me!"

I wonder why I don't have a panic button because maybe if I could push that, somebody would come help me! I don't hear the Tahoe! I walk a few more aisles...no Tahoe.

"If I get lost in here, what am I going to do? I have no idea what the layout of this stupid garage is; I could be in here for hours pushing this stroller with my stupid Gymboree bag." I wondered what I would do if I never found it. Who does one call in such situations? The Lost Vehicle Police? Hmmm.

I pushed panic again and I hear the soft bleating of my Tahoe. I'd be bleating like a sick lamb if somebody would just push my panic button. I follow the slowly-getting-louder sound. I stop the panic just as I come around the corner so it's not obvious I'm a complete brain-dead idiot that did not pick up one of those cute little cards as you go into the mall that identifies what frickin' PARKING LEVEL YOU'RE ON! But nooooooo, Amy's much too smart for that!

It felt like I was down there for 45 minutes but it probably was only like 10.

5 backward glances:

aberwiltonel said...

"I'd be bleating like a sick lamb if somebody would just push my panic button." I almost peed myself this was so funny!

friendinME said...

reminds me of a Seinfeld episode I saw a few times.

Heck the good news is that you didn't forget where you left the kid. :)

Christy said...

Amy, You crack me up! Sorry for your traumatic experience...I am glad you found your Tahoe! Thanks goodness for the panic button, eh?

Rachel said...

Seriously, you need to find a mom buddy to help you on these adventures. At the between the two of you there could be a few giggles about getting lost in a friggin parking lot!

Grammy said...

Sorry, but that was hilarious! Reminds me of Rod and Me. We couldn't find our car in the Joseph Smith Memorial Building Parking the day we got married! Isn't THAT pathetic? We still loose our car on occasion...