Sunday, December 23, 2007

Decisions & Consequences

Being an adult is like walking through the mirrors-maze at the fair. So many of our choices lead us to dead-ends. And even if you do find a doorway, it just leads you into more confusion. The confusion never has black & white answers either. Every choice (good or bad) has its own set of ramifications that can either take you out, or deeper in. It's maddening.

Sometimes I feel like I'm on the edge of an abyss, and one false move I'm going to fall into a sea of insanity. Am I normal? I don't know. What I do know is that I know virtually nothing about cause & affect. I am not a predictor. I don't understand "if...then". I have fallen into a of confusion instead.

It's easy to get here. You make a choice. The world reacts. You're stunned. Did you make a bad choice? You don't think so. Can you repair it? You try. You make a choice. The world reacts. You're stunned. It's a vicious circle...sometimes. Sometimes it goes your way. Actually a lot of the time. But the times it doesn't alter your perceptions and grows like a canker inside of you.

I'm not sure what I'm talking about here and I'm quite sure you're confused. I'm jabbering...the end.

4 backward glances:

Jessica said...

I think we all feel like that. We buy the furniture, two weeks later our transmission goes out, we can't fix it right away because of the furniture, we have to put it on our credit card, can't stay the full week in Florida on vacation now, yada, yada, yada... Live for today, Amy. Plan you life, but live for today. : ) That is my philosophy anyway.

Rachel said...

Cause and effect. It's part of life, yes it can be confusing but only if we pick it apart and analyze every aspect.
In the meantime, Merry Christmas. And I'm dreaming of a white Christmas...

Amy said...

thanks guys. that was a hard day! it helps to get it out though especially to forgiving ears. :)

josey said...

i know im a little late here, but i think jessica said it perfectly. i'm not sure if you were spiraled into the craziness via a certain incident, but i cant help but go back to a quote you posted a few months back:

"You did what you knew how to do, and when you knew better, you did better." Maya Angelou

ever since you posted it, i think about it when i feel like im spinning in a vicious circle and feeling like i dont know if im making the right choices!

hope things are better!! (((HUGS)))