Some Days Are Like This

This was NOT an awesome day. I felt so frazzled, more frazzled than I have in months. I literally locked myself away 2x today from my kids. That's not a good sign.

Tink was so fussy and has been all week long but today was the grand finale. I could not set her down for even a second. I tried my throw back tactic of putting her in her crib each time she screamed until she calmed and then I'd bring her back to society and I did that repeatedly until I felt like a torturer instead of a nurturer and gave up on it. We went outside to the sandbox where she had a much better time. But this was after several hours of dealing with the crying. The Marshmallow says he thinks she's getting a cold on top of whatever else has been ailing her all week long (teeth? constipation? who the freak knows anyway).

And so my typical o-so-patient response is to completely freak out on Bugs who is an angel comparatively these days and treat her like she's the one causing my angst. She's so ultra-sensitive that she has a melt down if you look at her the wrong way. And so I ended up in my bedroom, door closed, in tears myself, on my knees asking the Lord to please just help me know what to do and to please help me be a more patient and kind mother today. It helped; it always does even if just for the moment I had peace. That is until Bugs was pounding on the door (crying) wanting to know why I had shut my door and what I was doing (she gets scared when she's alone). It took ALL MY WILLPOWER not to screech at her to leave me the heck alone for just a few minutes. But to my credit, I opened the door slowly and kindly brought her in and explained that mommy is a nervous wreck and is tearing out her hair with Tink's crying and that mommy is sorry to take it out on Bugs.

I hate that I have to work but I'm actually glad that I get to go to work tomorrow morning and leave The Marshmallow with my world.

Oh, and to top off my awesome day, The Marshmallow brought home a little mini excavator to rip out some bushes in the backyard (yay!) and as he was maneuvering through the carport and into the backyard with it, he tore a huge chunk out of my totally awesome, nearly antique dehydrator that my mother so generously let me borrow last year (ya, borrow) - and now what I am going to tell her? They don't make these things anymore and it's like a family heirloom of sorts. I was absolutely SICK but it was a total freak accident and The Marshmallow is a total wreck over it. What could I say? Well, I did say a few choice phrases but took them back later when I told him I wasn't mad at him, just at what had happened.

Ahhhh. And he wonders why I like escapism in my leisure time.